I don’t know what it is but I never feel like I have time for anything and I spend the entire time from getting in the door to bed time in a rush where nothing gets done.
Then there’s nights like tonight where my wife was out for a run and I did the baby’s feeds and put him to bed.
I put the kids to bed. I cleaned out my Axolotl.
I also sorted the kitchen, ate my dinner, and then after that did some ironing, watched Kev do his Monday night Lollujo FM Twitch stream, and I managed to write about 3-4 pages of a script I’m working on.
All whilst doing this update and playing Pokemon Ultra Moon, talking on Whatsapp and following the latest Pokemon Go updates.
I ache like a bitch, but it seems like I always do at the moment. My shoulders feel constantly strained. Once I got a bit of momentum going I did all the odd jobs that would normally feel like mountains. Nothing on the list above is major, I know.
But usually I don’t have time to do anything, or at least it feels that way.
Watching Kev stream he was getting into how he started doing it for a living etc and what his long term plan is, and it does often make me think.
My long term plans hedge entirely around whatever diagnosis these blood tests and scans throw out.
If it’s something fixable that means I get my strength back then great, I think I’ll crack on and try to finish everything on my list, focus on building some new bits and pieces and hopefully get past this stagnant period.
If it’s something that is a bit more drawn out then I’ll have to evaluate on the fly and decide from there.
Overall I think I’d like to try and convince Kev to do some more comedy podcast stuff, and perhaps dabble with YouTube myself if I can figure out a format that works for me.
People have suggested just a basic Pokemon Go one would be enough, but I don’t think it’d be very fun to do as I tend to just ad-hoc drive across town and stuff, I prefer the fact that it is something I share really deeply with my son 1:1.
We have the small group of friends we’ve made on our travels, plus my friends from back home who play it too. I think doing videos on it would take away the special part of it.
I have often considered trying to just talk about current affairs or whatever news piques my interest.
It feels like it has potential to get me in trouble though.
I can form an opinion quickly enough based off of the facts presented to me though so I think I could deliver some information in an entertaining way.
I’ve also always dreamt of doing a music podcast but again it’s something that hinges on me making a load of connections and building a platform for it.
There’s also no one I know that would want to do it with me regularly, and also that i’d be able to logistically work with.
I think I’d prefer to do it on my own so I could control the style and the content to my tastes, and then people can either hate on it or enjoy it, eventually i’d have a large enough following of like-minded people who I think it would feed referrals my way of music that I’d enjoy.
Perhaps if I summed up that goal in one phrase it would be ‘Inherit the Hootenanny from Jules Holland’
A lot of this stuff feels like it needs spare days to do it in, but ultimately I could probably do a few of them an evening without disrupting my life too badly, and lots of weekend bits if I scheduled it around family.
I do need to spend a lot more time with my wife, I am thinking that tomorrow I will blog in my break and then leave the laptop alone all night so we can spend an evening together.
I mentioned that I hid the iPad and Kindle that belong to my son and daughter and it has been amazing how much time they spend with me now compared to when they were just tablet zombies.
That has made me feel like I am using my time more wisely when they’re awake but they go to bed at 7:30 so I have from then to midnight every day – 4.30 hours that I can spend doing other things, if I did 2:30 on nonsense I’d still have 2 hours to spend with my wife before I even touched the weekends.
I’ve been toying with ideas for recording random conversations whilst I’m driving – like if I could somehow record both sides of a conversation whilst talking on my phone then it’s an indie version of the various car share interview things, and it uses the 2 hours a day I sit in my car more wisely.
It might be impractical, considering I need to concentrate on the road, but I do sing like the whole way too and from work so sit can’t be that much difference?
I am full of ideas, and I imagine everyone reading this is also full of ideas that they don’t do – It is very frustrating!
I like to at least try to go and do the things I think of, but part of me is already angry knowing I wont do them, mainly because I can feel the pain in my shoulders intensifying and it reminds me that I’ll feel broken when I wake up tomorrow so don’t get my hopes up!
Hopefully I get my blood test results in the next day or so and we can start the ball rolling on some resolutions so I can start focusing on building some stamina and vitality and knock out some actual results rather than an endless sea of unfinished business.
What would you do if you had the time?
What can I do to make more time / use my time more wisely?